You don't know me. We were born 10 years apart in 2 different countries, and you were killed 20 years before I arrived in Sarajevo. Tomorrow, April 5th, is the 22nd anniversary of your death. I want you to know I think of you often. Every time I cross the bridge where you were shot while marching for peace, I think of you. Every time I pass the university where you were studying medicine, I think of you. And when I think of you, I wonder how easily it could have been me.
Had I been in college in Sarajevo at the time of the peace rally, I know I would have taken part. I would have rounded up my friends and joined the 100,000 others marching to be seen and heard, asking the warring sides to stop. I probably would have jostled my way to the front, just as you did, excited for the opportunity to raise my voice for peace, wanting the world to sit up and take notice. I would have smiled and locked arms with those beside me, joyous in presenting such a large, united front and hopeful that the march would make a difference!
And then I would have crumpled to the ground in shock, saddened by the outbreak of sniper fire and heartbroken for my family and friends who would now have to live life without me.
Yes, I very easily could have been you.
The senselessness of your death still haunts me. I wonder what kind of doctor you would have been. Perhaps we would have gotten to know one another in your obstetric practice when I was pregnant with Sam. Or perhaps you would have been a pediatrician, checking on Liam's growth and health and sharing a laugh with me on my inability to find pants to fit his tall, skinny body. Or maybe you enjoyed medical research and could have made incredible advancements in cancer or diabetes treatments.
All of these "What Ifs" make me sad and angry. And I become even more despondent when I think of how little has been accomplished here since your death. With rampant government corruption and a nearly 40% unemployment rate, people are unhappy. Times are tough again.
But there is hope. The people are finally unhappy enough to do something. There have been protests again. I just hope they remember you, Suada, and keep things peaceful as they fight for their beautiful country. I hope they remember the med student from Croatia who marched with Sarajevans from all cultures 22 years ago, and I hope they can put aside their ethnic differences and simply be Bosnians, united for a better future. I hope for Bosnia and Herzegovina, just as you did, 22 years ago. I hope, Suada. I hope.
Love,
Leslie
A plaque on the bridge where Suada and Olga were killed
(Photo courtesy of Geocaching)
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